Watching paint dry

I've spent the last hour sitting in my cubicle listening to our building maintenance man walk in to our conference room about every five minutes and curse up a blue streak. We ordered a massive white board that needed to be specially mounted in the conference room, so our maintenance man hired a guy a few days ago to do this. Apparently, this involved cutting a huge section of the wall out, and then filling it back in with drywall.

Yesterday, our maintenance man admitted he'd forgotten to hire a painter, so he said it looked like he was going to have to do it himself. I had a moment of doubt when he said this, but then I thought "He IS the maintenance man. Surely he's capable of painting a five by seven foot piece of wall." Well, I saw him applying the paint with a roller this morning. When he came back this afternoon, I heard him spew out obscenities that would make a sailor blush. I craned my head to look inside and saw the paint had dried about five shades darker than the rest of the wall. Not good. I couldn't help but feel a selfish moment of relief that I had nothing to do with this gaffe.

Hmmmm, maybe I'll pick up some vermouth on the way home so I can use that Bombay Sapphire Gin martini kit I got for Christmas.

Mental imagery, sexay style!

The other day I was conversing with a co-worker of mine in her cubicle. She's attractive, smart and funny, and of course very married. She mentioned she had been down for a meeting in the building we used to work in on the other side of town. While there, she had grabbed something to eat in the building cafeteria. When we worked there, I called this establishment the Crapeteria. The only reason anyone actually ate there was because anything else was simply too far away. The staff was surly (some of us were convinced they were there from a prison work release program), and their idea of a nutritious lunch was pogos and fries.

Anyways, my comely co-worker mentioned she had greasy bacon and eggs while she was there, and that they were surprisingly good. She was mentioning this as I was leaving to go back to my cubicle, and as I walked away she added something that I almost missed, but luckily my brain filter snagged for further observation. She said, "So now I'm all greased up for the day." As I was only half-listening by this point, I responded with a minimal, "Uh huh" and then stopped in mid-stride as my brain processed the double entendre. Did she say this intentionally to torment me or was it said off the cuff without thinking? In the end, I don't really care. I thanked her for the lovely mental imagery she had supplied me with and went back to my cubicle for some alone time.

Not on my watch

As many of you already realize, Canada is a pretty amazing place to live. We have freedoms and privileges here that many of the world's populace can only dream about. Along with these rights, however, come certain responsibilities. As the citizens of a democracy, it's important to maintain a vigil on our rights, to ensure they are not taken away or slowly eroded. Whether this be the rights of Canadians in general or just a section of our populace.

What I'm referring to is the recommendation of former NDP attorney-general Marion Boyd that Sharia law should be allowed to be practiced by Muslims in Ontario in the resolution of family disputes. Proponents of this say that Catholics and Jews are already able to arbitrate domestic disputes within their faiths. Therefore under the freedom of religion guaranteed in the Canadian Charter of Rights and Freedoms, Muslims should also be permitted to do this. There's a serious difference here. There is quite a history of Sharia law violating fundamental rights enshrined in our Constitution for equal treatment. Under some interpretations of sharia, a woman who is raped is guilty of tempting the man. Showing an ankle is tantamount to enticement. A Muslim husband has the right -- duty even -- to beat his wife if she's disobedient. A Muslim who converts to Christianity technically could face a death sentence. Are there likely to be executions and stonings in Ontario if this is implemented? Unlikely, but that isn't to say other forms of abuse won't be legitimized.

To see if only non-Muslims were against this, I decided to do some searching on the web to gather more info on Sharia, and came upon a letter sent to Ms. Boyd from the Canadian Council on Muslim Women. Among other points touched upon in this letter, they stated the following:

"For us, Islam is a religion of peace, compassion, social justice and equality, and we know that many of the interpretations and practices of Muslim law do not always reflect these principles. Further, we think that these fundamentals are embodied in the Canadian Charter of Rights and Freedoms.

And we advocate that as we are not compelled by our faith to live under Muslim family law, we as Canadian Muslim women want the same laws to apply to us as to all other Canadians. and not to have our equality rights jeopardized by the application of another system of jurisprudence."

As you can see, even they don't want Sharia law. Many of these women came to Canada to escape the oppression of Sharia law in their former homelands. Why would we inflict something like this on them?

While searching the web, I also learned about a woman named Homa Arjomand. Ms. Arjomand was born in 1952 in Iran and started her political/social activities when she was 17. She studied medical physics in England and has worked as a teacher in various colleges and universities. Since 1970 she has devoted her life fighting for women’s rights. In the winter of 1989 she fled Iran through mountains because her life was endangered by the Islamic Regime of Iran. Homa has lived in Canada since 1990, and is a member of the steering committee of The Organization for Women's Liberation; the coordinator of The Campaign in Defence of Women's Rights in Iran; Chair Person of Children First Now and also leads The Campaign Against Sharia Court in Canada. On the website for the latter campaign, there is a petition available to protest the setting up of a Sharia Court in Canada. I would ask all of you reading this to please go to this site and sign the petition. Tell your friends and family about it too. Will signing this petition actually make a difference in the Ontario government's decision on whether to allow Sharia courts? I honestly don't know. I hope it does make a difference.

In closing, I'd like to quote an individual who understood the importance of the separation of church and state and was also the author of the Declaration of Independence of the United States, Mr. Thomas Jefferson:

"In every country and in every age, the priest has been hostile to liberty. He is always in alliance with the despot, abetting his abuses in return for protection to his own."

Sharia Court in Canada? Not on my watch.

I keep an exceptionally clean penis

Boston Legal is now my favourite show on TV. James Spader does a masterful job of playing cocky, smarmy, womanizing attorney with a hidden heart of gold Alan Shore. And who could say anything bad about Bill Shatner's (aka Captain Kirk) portrayal of the law firm's formidable, but slipping in old age senior partner? As they say on the show, two words inspire awe and fear in people. Denny Crane. The title of this post comes from a line in last night's episode. Candace Bergen is a new addition to the show as Shirley Schmidt, name partner of Crane, Poole and Schmidt. Schmidt walks into the men's room to inspect it after a female employee of the firm launches a complaint that the fixtures in the men's room are nicer than in the ladies' room. Alan Shore finishes up at a urinal, and after some witty banter, introduces himself and extends his hand. Shirley looks at his hand and says, "Surely you intend on washing it first." to which Alan replies with the above line. I damn near busted a gut.

It was a pretty good weekend for me. I went out with a bunch of people to celebrate a friend's birthday. We started off with dinner at Big Daddy's Crab Shack, where I had a very tasty and spicy blackened redfish. After this, we went down to the Whiskey Bar in the market. The DJ, who was at the dinner with us, played an excellent mix of 80's retro. On Sunday, I was the Renaissance Skater, gliding along the frozen Rideau Canal with the Notorious MBA.

I'm also happy to say I've found a better route for driving to work. As the winter has progressed, I've found my original route has gotten steadily worse. I found I was spending too much time thinking about how I loathe and despise all the stupid drivers delaying my passage. This morning I arrived to work without the slightest urge to pound on my steering wheel and howl with rage. What a pleasant change.

Today is also the first day of my exercise program. I'm going to be doing a weight training program mixed with a little cardio. Hopefully I can stick to the program regularly. If so, by the summer I'll have muscles like frozen beef. Beefcake I say! BEEEEFCAAAAKE!!

Adendum to Year in Review

I thought of another item to add to my "Good Things of 2004" list. My brother taking me to see the Beastie Boys in Toronto for my birthday. It had been a while since I'd been to a large concert, and I'd never seen the Beastie Boys live, so I was really excited about seeing them. I've been listening to their music since I was 16, rockin' out to tunes like "No sleep 'till Brooklyn". Given this band's longevity in the music biz, it was interesting to see the wide variety of ages in the crowd. The Boys put on an awesome show and I went home that night musically sated.

The Year in Review

Well, my Renaissance Runnettes. I haven't written anything new on here for a while, so I figured I might as well start it off with my year in review.

The Good things of 2004:

I took up a new interest

Last January I signed up for a six weekend Hands-on Filmmaking Course. The course taught all the nuts and bolts of making a film such as directing, lighting, sound, using a 16mm movie camera, editing and even where to find funding for your potential blockbuster. The last few weekends were spent shooting and editing our own two minute black and white short film, which was a blast. Half of the fun of the course was being surrounded by people who loved quirky little films as much as I did. I followed this up in the summer with a five day directing course called "A week in the hot seat". Here we got to work with professional actors and learn how to give proper direction to bring out their best performance. I have several ideas for short films I want to do. Now I just need to get off my butt and do them.

My vacation in Cuba

Around the end of January, I had had it with the vicious cold snap in our nation's capital and suggested to my girlfriend at the time, "Let's go someplace sunny and warm". This resulted in a very enjoyable week at the end of February in an all-inclusive resort in Cuba, laying on the beach, swimming in the ocean, sipping rum drinks and even renting a car and tooling around the island. This was just what I needed to make it through the winter. It wasn't until after we got back to Canada that my girlfriend admitted she hated it there. The reason being she is more the staying in a hostel, living among the locals and losing ten pounds from dysentary type. I prefer my creature comforts, especially when you only have a week. This, plus a couple of other things resulted in our breakup. The trip did highlight our incompatibilities. I suppose it was better to find this out when I did rather than a year or two down the road.

My Brother got married

I should add to this by saying my brother got married to a wonderful and supercool chick, and I'm not just saying that because she bakes me lots of really tasty cookies. On top of this, I was the Best Man for the ceremony, which meant I had the honour of planning the debauchery of the bachelor party in Niagara Falls. Good times! The ceremony was great, and the party later that night couldn't have gone better.

I ran my first marathon

October 17th, a day that will live in infamy. In spite of the rain and -1 celsius wind chill, I'm still glad I ran the Toronto Marathon. At least I had on long running tights, a long sleeve running shirt and a wind breaker to provide some protection from the elements. I felt sorry for the poor saps who had decided to wear shorts and a t-shirt for that day. The last 10k were ran purely on willpower. My friends who cheered me on along the way were a big help in keeping my spirits up when fatigue was dragging me down. Plus the knowledge that my family were at the finish line to cheer me in and had gatorade and dry clothes waiting for me. Will I run another one? Perhaps.

I bought a mountain bike

To get in some cross training for my marathon, I decided to buy a mountain bike. It had been over a decade since I had ridden a bike, and rediscovered the simple joy of going for a bike ride. I also started going trail riding with a couple of friends. On my second trail ride I slipped on some pointy rocks and got a nice gash in my forearm which required 7 stitches in the emergency room. Now I have a manly scar on my arm and a mountain biking "war story".

The Bad things of 2004:

My job has gotten progressively worse

Our office moved from a ten minute walk from my apartment to a half-hour or more drive from my apartment. One of the main reasons I chose the apartment I'm now in was because I could avoid rush hour traffic, which I passionately loathe. The duties in my job were changed which made my job thoroughly less enjoyable. My staff was taken and given to a complete knob who happens to play golf with the boss. Now I find out that this knob will be the new boss by the end of the summer. I'm actively working at finding another job. Hopefully these efforts pan out before the douchebaggery becomes just too much to bear.

My summer girlfriend broke up with me two days after my brother's wedding

This former girlfriend and I are now friends. As a matter of fact, she even reads my blog from time to time. And while I don't harbour any feelings of ill will towards her for the breakup in general, I have to say her timing sucked. Could I have felt like a bigger loser for the next couple of weeks after this? I think not.

Overall, the year was pretty good. Now if I can just do something about this job, 2005 could shape up to be the year of Chris.